TJ

by Laurel Ave.

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thishellofmine
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thishellofmine such a good album :)
CodyDubya
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CodyDubya A nice collection of emo songs. I really liked the change from straight time to swing on the song, "Newspaper," and the harmonies/double tracking on the rest of the record. The overdriven vocals on tracks like "Ghosts and Seashells" was a nice touch too. Favorite track: Newspaper.
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about

The first record by Oregon alternative outfit Laurel Ave.

credits

released February 14, 2017

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Laurel Ave. Portland, Oregon

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Track Name: Heleña de Troya
you looked me you loved me
and I asked you the time
it was early in the morning
it was late in the night
and sardonic sidewinder
why do you hide
we are always closed
we are better off
we decide

so are you satisfied
with the way that you care
soap opera acting
while the lovers they stare
in between his shirts
there's a piece of her hair
they are oh so close
they are faithful
they swear

on a barstool your barcode
you sell yourself short
I'd bet all of my hours
you've got more than you can afford

it's salacious it's sacred
the crowd chants from their pew
they are beggars and braggarts
but they just seem to view
the entire planet
as a new thing to use
for entertainment
I am sickly
I refuse

on a barge fuel your barcodes
you sell yourself slight
I'd bet all my attention
you'd take all of our lives

rumors work both ways
I live unlike I believe
hypocrisy my title
your name's my relief
I'll banish myself
do as you please
I digress
I'm off topic
help me

in a blight pool my heart grows
I will sell myself choice
I'd bet against all my self doubt
I will make a joyous noise
Track Name: Newspaper
come now sweet meanness and save me
from every single thing that I fear
because when I needed helping
she said I feel just a little weird

flowers bloom over the ocean
I've turned yelling at the roadside
it's changed yellow as a coward
and made me colder than the sea's tide

this is too simple I know something's wrong
she said, she said
like a black and white photograph
The color’s gone in days spent
she said you aren't reading like you
used to before
not the look on my face
or the newspaper

said I'm making out pensive plans
making paper airplanes
who the hell am I kidding now
what was really made

When I start to stare out perched upon
Purple towels towered cluttered
The sand is bright burned all around me
There is no room left to wonder

the truth is simple I've been here too long
in this place, this place
like the back of my photograph
the real weight of my face
and I can't bear to read it
aloud anymore
do I want to see that name that date
in the newspaper
Track Name: Betty and Veronica
every man is a garbage man
some are givers some are takers
there's no lie larger than how've you been
don't be shy, we're all creators

of some trash so pick it up
and believe you're good enough
for something resembling love
but that's not good enough

you felt like mustard on my tongue
like a fly passing over my skin
like a saxophone when you sung
I hope you fall down the stairs

but I refuse to forgive your God
You asked the truth, I said I'm not
we are all our own God

I am the prettiest girl in the picture
Track Name: His and Hers
Solemnly scream as you love next to me
Tell me what they really say and what they mean,
When they say that they love

What have you heard and could it be worse
Tell me what they really say and what they are worth
Except what they say that they love

So you just hold yourself down
If you don't, they'll arrive promptly and give you your keys to the ground

So I believe I am right I believe I am wrong
I fall asleep every night and I die like a song
That I wrote, but I've shown
To no one at all

So the flowery wallpaper folds like my skin
And my head and my bones and my body are sin
So I drink blood, and I break bread
And I hope I am clean

But these candles don't bring God back into the room
They are petty and awful and when the are used
They are statues
That is all they can become

So a wedding cake wasted is all that it is
There is nothing there is nothing there is nothing
but his
And hers
Nothing is shared.
Track Name: Fool's Gold
Would I excoriate you
When I don’t know your best friend’s face
For walking past me
On the sales floor

Rebecca I remember your name
But I don’t really know your ways these days
So why do I even feel
Superior

I wish for naught
I wish for something
With my mouth full of fools gold
The clouds that I needed started breaking

So I cut my flag at half mast
And I leave it flying Gold and Green
Like the Summer
Like the noises of dear spring

Like the heads from their shoulders
Wanton Mother, angry father
Like dirty leaves in the winter
Mortal Body I must leave

Hold up the shield
We are cowards in disguise
And we never kneel
We are the colors of the sky

Not black as night
We are alive we are alive
He could have started to fight
He had to die, they all had to die
Track Name: Curse
our league, ivy
creeping in constantly
we are the bill that never wanted
to be paid

but beat down the door
and I don't blame you for crying
and after all this time
I still hate my fucking name

tell yourself it helped
if it helped you that much
give yourself some credit
there's worse things you could become

than apathetic
to all that you was
As if I'm the Mean one
for holding the grudge

so I fold out my mattress
lay on the floor
told you I didn't mean it
I didn't mean much more

and I said I was grateful
I don't see what for
I don't seem to see you
I don't need to anymore

so I wrote you a song
but you still won't listen
even if I turn the volume
all to ten

and I gave you my word
I would return my blessing
it's been a curse
since the day it began
Track Name: The Devil's Name is David
do you smile without laughing
are you filled with disbelief
remember what he told you
the devil's name is so sweet

when songsters are hunters
there is nothing in between
on his clothes, smell of the desperate
but his teeth are very clean

when you look at yourself
do the images sway
with flashes and filters
still the recorder plays

miserable mess of a man
do you believe in all that you write
how long can it possibly take
for a character to die

and you're left on the stage afraid
with your words In your throat
because living this global
gives good reason to die alone

delay it is something
that hits you in decades
it's coming right back around now
and you are still finding your state

Camera shy, but you're holding the trigger
on the edge of your seat
Remember what he always told you then,
The Devil's name is so sweet
Track Name: Backdraft
Feeling put out
put through a time of lethargy
looking last time
looked like a forest in front of me

held close to you
I hear your backdraft
without weakness
we're just sharp math

bonfire bleed out
heat from the headdress or bedside
driving drinking
beauty consumes a blur of headlights

keep me happy
trying to help
felt far from you
that's all I felt

That was your most important job
So why do I feel drenched or drowning
in the weight of blamelessness you're not
I’m alone in the lake and you're back stroking

This was your most important job
So why do I feel drenched or soaking
In the weight of blamelessness you’re not
I’m alone in the wake and you’re still floating
Track Name: Ross
Instrumental
Track Name: Ghosts and Seashells
Describe me, how you would, with no one, else around
Cut every, extremity, from your vocabulary, and tell me now
Sweet, parallel Universe, Please, Conquer earth, and take me away

I put you in a seashell/ threw you back into the ocean
from which/ you came

and in this deep blue loneliness/ tormented by my animus
is much/ the same

from above, below/ left and then right
in front and behind/ they come

and together they're found/ in some sorry amount
like a plastic/ rosary strung

on this freezing violet mountain range/ the moon sits and seasons change
while I look/ at them

but I collapse on the ground/ and I never am found
and I'm shaking/ my hands

with the ghosts of myself/ and the hardest they held
we're the times/ when you were around

so I shed all my guilt/ and I've never felt
a more beautiful/ sound
Track Name: Vamp
you're placing your mouth to mine
lipstick stained a parasite
as you wrestle around for the keys you can't find I wait

and you look like a regress
so regal and she said
that she loves you but her eyes give the lies

a life of their own
and she's taking you home
from the backseat to the back porch
you've contrived
that she's treating you right

and you've bit me the last time
the camera's turned blind
the show's been canceled as you sleep through the day

in the boxes your mother,
your mother your sisters
I bide my time, it's time I'm away

write it up in scarlet
there's a reason we are always waiting here
for you to make up
your mind

advance the plot
and the whole wide world above ground cheers
what have you made
of your life

and I loved you
with every breath I drew
took the air into my lungs
took my body out through my blood

and I gave it up
and I gave it up
I will give it all up
I'm giving up on us
Track Name: José
I had a brother who was a carpenter
he took pain for other people's fear
and though it felt like crucifixion
he smiled from ear to ear

he told us all that resolution
is a sound we don't want to hear
he asked can you call me Joseph
I said that was a good idea

well he ate a bottle of Benadryl
I guess he was allergic to himself
but he couldn't fix his allergy
and nobody would help

and they wouldn't let him have his cure
they brought him back alive
ambulances always playing god
decide who has to live and who gets to die

I had a brother who we called John Doe Christ
he was ashamed of the name he was given
and he knew all the sinners
and he apologized for all of their sins

but his father was on the CBN
he needed much more then that
he needed to stop the seventh sounding
he needed to fill up his hat

with the coins we have
and the love we don't
with the hate on our skin
with the mistakes in our bones

and I love you
is that all that matters
I didn't show it soon enough
it seemed like it was

well who the fuck are you
to depress the shit out of me
and then tell me it's my fault for making
life so depressing

the rapist said now officer
I had a swell time
and the murderer said he had it coming
the blood I spilt ain't mine

you're a liar and a bastard
you project more than you don't
id probably still make excuses for you
with your hands around my throat

I said I'm done
in every song
but I ain't done
so let's start a sing along

we make excuses for the ones we love
they will beat and bruise and bury us
under mounds of manipulation
and then curse our hesitation

to begin to love and start to trust
those who've beat and bruised and buried us
under mountains of stipulations
there's no such this as unconditional love
Track Name: Heaven
Keep dancing/ keep on moving/ your complete utter removal
is alright

Red on blue just run together/ come on pull yourself together
It’s alright

And I treat you like summer / I’m a lover I can’t love her
And I’m alright

The whole damn places turns disco/ rip off our tuxedos
We’re alright

mumbling dirt mound walk around mumbling dirt mound walk around Yeah
You’re shaky shaky shaky now I’ve been stopping you from wiggling out like California drinking itself to drought you should be ashamed to be so proud.

You said he made you feel like Heaven
at an age when you believed all of their lies
and you would never ever dream of the many evil things
that a person could do with their life

I told you that I needed my medication
You said I probably just needed some more sun
So I’m lying in a field/ With a light I can feel
On my eyes but it ain’t the right one

But when I was young
I was strong, I was a god
Oh how I was wrong

When I raised my voice to speak
Nobody answered me
I guess I was alone or maybe I swallowed my tongue
This guilt on my back weighs a ton

But this spot on my arm Is a warning of where we are
I’m sorry if I think it’s just fashionable to be a friend
And I would never ever dream/ of any other thing
Than feeling like heaven once again
Track Name: Icarus Dive
I raise my gaze
and I rarely reveal my teeth
I smile when they say
do whats expected of me

And you can’t change your name
you can't change your practice
your love you must keep
my reality tv actress

Keep staring keep staring
you must never shut your eyes
and turn on the bathroom light
every single night

hold my breath
this four person falling golden
giving up
Icarus dive over open ocean

am I selfish
for saying that grief is the latest fashion statement
so self absorbed

am I lying
am I going somewhere and I can't take it
what body of water am I falling towards?